Toronto Digital Queeries- January 1, 2004
By Michael Paré, Toronto ON
No room at the inn "T'is the season to be jolly" . . . That is, unless you are young and queer.
This message was brought home to me not long ago when a friend called for help with a young man who had just been thrown out of his home by his mother. Sean was to start a job the next week but he didn't even have a place to stay. With less than $10 in his pocket, Sean was devastated. The holidays are upon us and the holiday music is echoing in all the stores.
Somehow the tunes have a hollow sound for me knowing that there are others like Sean out on the streets tonight. Statistics point out that too many of the homeless teens are queer. How can a country that is proud of its family values, allow any teen to be homeless during the holidays or any night of the year?
Some say the economy is the culprit and that budgets are tight all over. However, budgets are not at the root of our queer youth being thrown out of their homes. So what is it that causes parents to turn on their own children?
In order to cope with their feelings of being different and wrong, lesbian, gay and bisexual youth develop specific strategies to survive in a world that is not only largely hostile towards them but also often dangerous. Only three choices are available to them: they can hide their identities in an attempt to create a public persona that appears heterosexual; they can deny their growing awareness of attraction to members of the same sex and attempt to prove to themselves and others that they are heterosexual; or they can "come out" and begin the process of incorporating a positive sexual identity into their sense of self
Many of them will end up, in disproportionate numbers, living on or near the culture of acceptance that they find there may represent to them their first opportunity to be themselves and becomes a strong magnet to remain on the street. However, the unstable nature of this population, combined with the dangers of physical violence, sexual exploitation, sexually transmitted diseases and alcohol and substance abuse present risks that far outweigh the benefits of acceptance.
Unable to talk openly to their families, foster parents, workers or friends, they may become increasingly isolated and socially withdrawn. They are frequently chronically depressed, in danger of self-harming behaviors such as alcohol and substance abuse to help numb their pain and at high risk of attempting suicide when the pressure becomes too much to bear. Indeed, researchers estimate that up to one third of all adolescents who commit suicide are lesbian or gay
According to the PTS & Ottawa-Carleton GLBT Health Task Group’s research for: “A Proposal for a GLBT Health/Wellness Needs Assessment and Community Resource Mapping Project”, they found that 25 – 40% of homeless youth are GLBT.
The Fort York Food Bank one of Toronto's largest food banks serving the downtown core, distributed a three day food basket to 8,739 poor people. Meals Provided through their food program, 12,807. Number of poor and homeless adults, 11,544 and 4, 1786 children from January to November 2003. Toronto social assistance only gives $195 a month to people living on the street, many gay youth are denied this meager city handout, so rely on Out of the Cold programs, food banks, friends and begging.
In 2003 nearly 130,000 children - 1 in 3 under the age of 15 in Toronto live in poverty. More than 59,000 children relied on food banks, up 35 percent from 1995. Nearly 5,000 children stayed in emergency homeless shelters. 7, 500 children were on the waiting list for subsidized child care, but the city has fewer spaces now than it did a decade ago.
There are other Seans around us. His plight taught me so much. I found out as I searched for shelter for him, that the one agency that would accept a young person of his age was open from Mondays to Fridays. Sean needed shelter on a Saturday. Even if I had started looking for help on Friday when his mother threw him and his belongings out of the house, the agency was closed for the day.
What we need is a 24-hour, seven-days-a-week open line. Budgets are tight, so if we have this increased service we also would need more rooms at the inn to handle the calls for help. This would be possible if we truly valued and respected all God's creations. This would be possible if our families really valued each of their relatives, both the gay and the straight.
As we start 2004 , remember all the other nameless queer youth living on the streets of Toronto during the coldest months of the New Year.
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